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Saturday 31 May 2008 | 00:16
Visionary.

Attended mass today with Rebecca. I had to bring jeans and shoes for that little... damn, she better be grateful. Talked to Shitface a bit while Rebecca went to change after mass. We talked about grades and I told him about how I feel so un-smart. I think he made me feel a bit better. He thinks I party a lot though. I don't! Not enough to be called a party-goer even. He said, "You're just like me lah." I was appalled. He said he used to play everyday in sec 2, but I said, "I don't play everyday!" Geez. And that stupid boy so insulted me. Moron. Beeeetch. (: Hahah. Let's hope he never sees this.

Anyway, Addison is quite funny. I said to him, "You know my cousin right? Sam Tan?" and he had this really shocked look on his face and he pointed at me said, "OMG you're that damn big family one ah?!" Then he started talking about the "my cousin" thing. I get that quite a bit. Hahah. I suppose the family is pretty big. I remember Joachim said to me, "your family is like everywhere," and I said, "yes, that's not always a good thing." I mean, sure it's cool having Sam and all in school, and Gabriel and all at church. And family gatherings are always fun. But then there's the "bad side", because they're always around and y'know, there. So far, so good though. I love 'em.

Every time I talk to Daryn I feel like he's just so smart. It's like he gets cleverer by the minute. I am so awed.

Yeah I think going online counts as a happy thing. (: NO, not just because I'm talking to you, you moron.
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Thursday 29 May 2008 | 15:53
Built To Last.

Well, I'm glad to say I have finally crossed over. At least I think I have. Then again I have this hunch that maybe I've been here for quite some time but yet never actually realised it because I keep looking back, y'know? This side is pretty rocky, but so far so good. It's pretty fun; more personal. Though sometimes I forget again. Hey I'm not the only one. And Gill my friend, I'm not emo. I'm just blogging. (:

I'm getting a sore throat. And I realise I don't really like typing. It gets tiring.


Happy belated 16th, Julian. Though I haven't seen you in two/three freakin years. (:
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Monday 26 May 2008 | 13:58
Stuck In Reverse.
Stuck In Reverse.


We won 3rd place for the Inter-class mass dance competition, and 1st place for rounders. (: I'm so proud of 2/3. We put in a lot of effort in the bloody dance. I paid $9.60 for my bloody cab fare to Gwen's house on one practice day. Bloody cabbie... cheated me of my money. Oh wells, I think the few arguments and shouting (mainly from Gwen. Hurhur) was worth it. It was fun.

Report books are back. Not exactly happy with my results I have to say. I really got to work harder next time. Parents aren't happy either. I guess it could be worse though.

My dear friend, please stop beating yourself up over this. I don't know if you ever read this, but cheer up. It's not the end of the world. There are greater things yet to come. (:

Maybe I'm being selfish, but I don't want to make the first move anymore. I have a feeling I will give in sooner or later. But not now. Whenever I do something or make a decision, you always come into my head and I choose based on what you might do or what you would think of me. It's a bad habit and I want to kick it. It seems so weak and pathetic, which is perhaps what you think of me as well. And that makes me despise you. But then again, there's always something that draws me to you. I can never stay mad at you for long.

In any case, the GSS has started and I bought a lot of things yesterday. Pull and Bear top, two pairs of shoes from River Island, grey skinnies(finally) from Zara and some other accessories. Haven't shopped till I dropped yet though. I need more cash.

Happy belated Sweet Sixteen, Sam! BCFerss forever w0rxzx.
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Sunday 18 May 2008 | 20:57
All the roads we have to walk along are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding.

Pretty tiring day today. Had a lazy morning spent with Eugenia and Nut. We had leftover pizza for breakfast. Headed to Gwen's house for dance practice till about 4, then we jumped in her pool. Her maid wasn't too happy about that. She knows all our names, but she doesn't like us much. Then at about 5 I rushed back home to bathe and change, then took a cab to church.
Dead beat now.

I was planning to write about yesterday's party, but as I expected, it wasn't so much a fantastic one. I remember sometime last week I was telling Nut I had a feeling the party would turn out to be a disaster, and she said I was thinking too much. I have a habit of doing that; thinking a lot.
I guess the party was pretty memorable, what with The Dare game, although I wish some other people could've been there. Thanks to all that came though, and thanks to Clara, Marie, Gill, Chuan Shen, Daryn, Keane, Darius and Ryan for the gifts. Thank you Christian for paying for some of the pizza.

I was quite surprised at Chuan Shen's gift. I really didn't expect it. Even Nut was shocked. Thanks so much for it, dear disciple. (: Glad I could celebrate with you again, Eugenia, and I look forward to more of our parties in the years to come. Oh please continue to think about what you'd like, and I will too.

It was Jerome's last day yesterday. I missed my Sentosa trip to go for class and he was like, "But you go Sentosa like everyday lo." How ungrateful. but I managed to make him feel a little guilty. He admitted it himself. (: Well I missed it partially because quite a number of people couldn't make it, but also because of class! Joined them for lunch after, seeing as I had so much time to kill before the Geylang party.
Aaron was complaining about how our Fiesta sucked and it was "so hot", there was "no food", when he asked for apple juice they gave him orange juice, and the vending machine wasn't working and he couldn't find the switch for it. (: Hoho!
I guess that was the only real lunch I had with them. Real meaning I ate food. I think I was quiet. I'm not loud actually, but I didn't really talk. Anyway, I'll really miss having Jerome around in class, and laughing at him. Surprisingly. Even though he gives me the skeptical "I know you're up to something" look all the time, even when I don't say anything. All the best, my friend. The class will miss Shitface. And that'll never get old.


I don't believe that anybody
feels the way I do,
about you now.
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Saturday 17 May 2008 | 07:38
I'm scared. I think I'm scared to cross the line. Yet I don't want to stay on this side forever.
It's a pretty thin line, I can see what's on the other side. Grass looks greener on the other side. And I want that.
I'm scared.

p.s. Don't lead me on just to let me down. I hope what I'm feeling isn't real.


Thanks Mervelle, for always listening to me. Even if what I rant about is stupid and pointless. Even when I make a big deal out of everything. Just like now.

In any case, only the "Geylang party" is on now. Due to many unplanned things.

I hope to make the most of what we have left.
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Sunday 11 May 2008 | 00:57
Game on.
Game on.


Alph was talking about his upcoming wedding during dinner earlier on. He seems like he knows what he wants. We were trying to look for a "job" for Sam and I, and he suggested decorating the church. I guess he realised that making a bunch of 14-16 year old girls decorate a church is not gonna happen, so he thought of a more important one- pouring tea. For the tea ceremony that is. It'd be pretty cool. Plus, we get ang baos. Whooo! He got a better idea though, he said we could be the people attending to the guestbook thing on which people sign, on the night itself. That would be quite awesome; we get ang baos too. (: He warned us that there would be a lot of people though. But I think we can handle it. Sam, sis, Amanda and I = Fantastic Four.

Hm, I had an unexpected lunch with Joachim, Jerome and Aaron today. Dad's car couldn't start after class and I was tired of waiting so I decided to go find somebody to lend me coins to get a drink, since I didn't bring my wallet. Found Van and Joachim but Van didn't have any money either, so Joachim lent me a dollar to buy Ribena. Then he asked me along for lunch with Jerome and Aaron. I have to admit I didn't really want to go, because I'd feel super extra, and I didn't have cash. Well, so much for excuses because Joachim said it might be the last and only chance I get to be with the three of them, and Ashton joins them sometimes, and, he would treat me. Yeaahh so nice. But Ashton is extra and I didn't really want to be. I gave in and went anyway though, after some persuasion. However, Aaron and I didn't eat, and I felt slightly uncomfortable, I think due to Aaron being there. He's a nice guy but I don't talk to him much.

Overall, lunch was pretty cool. (:
I don't know what class would be like without Teacher and Jerome though. Really different, I would imagine. As much as I hate to say it, I'll miss them. I'll miss laughing at Jerome so often. Next week will be his last class and I don't want to miss it, but I think I'd have to cancel the Sentosa bit of my party to attend class. And honestly, I don't really mind, on account of we're already heading to Sentosa on Monday and Tuesday. But I still have to discuss this with Eugenia. Party's still on though.

Whatever non gassy!
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Wednesday 7 May 2008 | 13:44
Look After You
Look after you.

I think I flunked Math.
Ah wells. At least that's over. Tomorrow comes the last paper- Geog. Which I have not mugged for. Hoho. Hope to watch The Hottie and The Nottie after that. Keana said it sucks but I want to watch it anyway.

Hm, I was just talking to Joachim and he asked me if I remember when we first started messaging. I can't exactly remember when, but the farthest I remember was last year when I was doing late-night mugging for Science, and teacher messaged me something like, "GOAAAAALLLLLL! We scored! Doubt you're watching, you're probably asleep. ". If I remember correctly, that is. Well according to him it's been a year. Coolio. How time flies.

It's gonna be quite tough on Aaron when Teacher and Jerome leave. I'd be scared. But it's okay Aaron, you'll probably never read this, but don't worry! I WILL LISTEN IN CLASS. Being the good girl that I am. Hurhur. I have faith in you man. (:

Marie is laughing like crazy over the phone and its hurting my ears.

I feel like having sushi.
...

Monday 5 May 2008 | 12:22
Hatch Day
Ah, as they say- another year older, another year wiser. Let's hope so.
Apart from the Science paper which I think I pretty much screwed up, and all the stressing over Lit, my birthday's been pretty good. Breakfast with Gill, Marie, Nut, Rachael and Eugenia was fun. We laughed alot, as usual. (: Love hanging out with you guys. Thanks for the cake and 'crown'! Dinner @ Greenwood was good too.



And thanks to all that messaged/commented/called to say happy birthday. Including those in school too. Appreciate it y'all. I tried to remember everyone and put the names in order as best as I could. (:



Nut, Rachael, Joachim, Gill, Adeline, Claudia, Sam, Shruthi, Mae, Gabriel, Nicole, everyone in school- Tabitha*, Nut (again), Gill (again), Diandra, Clara, Mervelle, Rachel Oh, Gwen, Marie, Gloria, Sam** (again), Samira (hahah), Anne, Eunice, Rachel, Amanda, Chloe, Bryan, Nut (again), Darius, Rebecca, Mervelle***, Jerome W. Xiao Ming, Christian Sng Buay, Eunice, Cheryl, Daphne, Clara.

I hope I didn't leave any names out.
Thanks one and all for making this 14th "hatch day" an awesome one.



* Thanks for the candy! (: Eating the Jelly Tots now.
** Sorry about the vulgar reply. Diandra's doing.
*** Thanks a lot for the super sweet blog wish. I felt so touched. Love you. (:
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Sunday 4 May 2008 | 00:28
I want to break free.
I want to break free.

Trying to do a bit of studying for lit now. I'm super super scared for the paper. We have 5 freaking stories and I've barely started memorising quotes. What's another word for screwed?

First person to give me a birthday present was Gabriel. He called me after mass on Friday and our conversation on what I want lasted about 12 minutes (from the interchange till I took off my shoes at home). In the end he bought me Havainas. I've been wanting a new pair for months now. I wanted either a red or white pair. He bought me the two coloured one. White top sole, black bottom, black strap. (: Initially he wanted to get it for himself, but he got it for me instead. How sweet. Hahah. Hey but I'm nice too, I bought him the Topman Ghostbusters tee.
Well, he claimed he walked around Heeren cracking his brain over what to get me and then he decided to call Sam, and my sis. Sam said he should get an Arsenal jersey and he was like, "You think I print money or what?!" Hoho. But I love the Havainas. Thanks Gabriel! (:

We had ice cream at Ben and Jerry's @ Dempsey road earlier. With Nicole, Bryan, Hanae and all after dinner. I ordered the Cookie Cookie Sundae. I think I might get diabetes. B&J OD-d on sugar, man. Oh and they actually got a cake for me with candles they couldn't light because the fan was directly above it. Thanks guys. (:
Woah it's not even my birthday yet and I'm already thanking people. Hoho.

Oh speaking of B&J's, it was Free Cone Day on Tuesday. Headed to United Square with Diandra, Marie, Gill and Nut. We queued for 40 freaking minutes before I got my free scoop of chocolate therapy. But it was pretty much worth the wait. It didn't really seem like 40 minutes after all the lame jokes. (: Although some lucky shits only had to queue for 10 minutes. Aye. Cheap thrills. I like cheap thrills. Like jaywalking, or more like jayrunning in town.

Hm since it's 1am already, Happy 21st, Cesc!

Stupid Friendster is currently under maintenance and pissing me off. Bleaah. I was never such a frequent Friendster user until about 4 months ago? Just replying all the comments from other bored people passes a lot of time.

I feel quite "out" of things recently. Even though we may all be in a group, talking and laughing, it hardly feels the same anymore. Maybe it's just me, I don't know. All the seperate inside jokes, and all the secrets. All the talking behind backs. It makes everything so different. Ah, like wise ol' Daryn says- change is life's only constant. So it seems.
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